sail to the moon

I'm sitting in my kitchen while Karolina munches on the only food in our place. We're both waiting for the wave of sleep to hit us. I think it's already hit me. I'm going to go ride my bike in the morning, forget about my day until I meet reality. Maybe as hard as I hit a giant bush yesterday, who knows? Today was an odd day, things started feeling less difficult, almost. Though sometimes I make it difficult for myself. I went for a walk to clear my head. I went along the seawall eating my Kit Kat, almost choked when I found out how far I walked. Sometimes it's hard to think with other people around, no matter if there's noise or silence. Even though I feel a bit better, there's still a heavy weight in my chest. I guess it's just old feelings. The moon and water were put perfectly together, as though they were there for only me.

bom bom bom

Tomorrow evening I start a photography course at Emily Carr University. I have no idea how it will turn out. In some ways I'm frightened, but then again, I am excited. I've come to terms that I don't "want" anything anymore, since whatever I passionately want will never fulfill my longing. I suppose there's not a word to describe what my goals are; probably because they're not really necessities either. I am happy, to say the least. I now own a precious camera that I'm using only minimally (I don't want to wear my camera's sensor~~*). Austin is sailing up to my precious country of maple syrup and beavers (I'm sure he misses the taste of real Canadian bacon). I'm expecting him and his bro's next weekend or even earlier but who knows? Maybe a hurricane will appear? All I really crave is to take 'Free Slurpee Day' into consideration.

I'm very unimpressed with the weather right now. It's July, it's supposed to be HOT and SUNNY. Why clouds and 20 degree weather?